The Situation: The character and their best friend are camping by a stream in the woods. Suddenly, a large and angry grizzly bear attacks the campers. What do the characters do?
Tech Infantry Trooper (retired) Miro Creed (Bax)
Miro grabs a bottle of honey from the picnic basket, squirts honey on his friend, and waves "bye-bye" as the friend runs off, chased by a hunger-maddened bear.
Earth Fleet Commodore Erich Von Shrakenberg (Martin):
Erich first tries to contact his ship in orbit above the planet, to order a kinetic interdiction strike with mass drivers to kill the bear. Failing that, he will talk his friend into sacrificing himself in a futile attack on the bear, saving Erich's life, so that Erich can go on to die for the Federation in a more effective manner later on.
InSec Captain Andrea Treschi (Chris)
Treschi mind-controls his friend into charging the bear, then beats a hasty retreat for the woods.
"Kiddo" Hex (Andy Wooden)
Early Version: Turns invisible, runs up to the bear, and beats the crap out of it with his katana. But before finishing off the bear, he suddenly turns and runs off to keep an appointment he suddenly remembers that he has on the other side of the galaxy.
Later Version: Summons a horde of angelic warriors to save him from the bear.
Tech Infantry Lt. Malachi Spyder (Josh)
Spyder charges the bear with guns blazing, but gets his ass kicked by the bear, despite the fact that he's wearing power armor and carrying a plasma carbine, whereas the bear only has teeth and claws and a furry hide that can be set on fire by plasma bursts. He is captured by the bear and forced to join the bears in hibernating through the winter and foraging for berries.
Tech Infantry Major Alastar Dimiye (Frank)
Dimiye charges the bear and kills it with his amazing combat skills. While Dimiye is busy finishing off the bear, however, a second bear sneaks up from behind and kills his friend. Dimiye then screams "Nooooooooo!" and agonizes over his failure for the next four acts.
InSec Covert Operative Xavier Pollos (formerly LI Captain Mark Smith) (Matt)
Early Version: Charges in to kill the bear, pulls out his magic sword, screams "By the Power of Grayskull!", kills the bear, chops down several trees with the sword, and then whittles them into an attractive dinette set before the battle rage leaves him drained and unconscious.
Later Version: Assumes the bear is actually a were-bear sent by the Raptors to take revenge on him for killing Arthur Clarke, and runs off to contact his associates in the criminal underworld to put a hit out on the were-bear. The friend dies.
Earth Fleet Commander Xinjao O'Reilly (Ed)
The bear wears himself out beating the living daylights out of Xinjao, who can take more punishment than any man alive. The bear saunters off to hibernate through the winter, and Xinjao convalesces in peace, secure in the knowledge that the porn magazines hidden in the picnic basket are safe.
Free Citizen Justine Macoure (Lloyd)
Justine tries to trip the bear with her prehensile tail, but gets eaten instead. Her friend Freak escapes, blathering incoherently and grinning like a maniac.
Righteous Army Pilot Brother Caleb (Tim)
Brother Caleb kneels down to pray that Jesus will save him, recieves a vision from God, and instead turns, beats the crap out of his friend, and feeds him to the bear.